2007;

2007-06-24T10:46:00.003+08:00

hello everyone i switched to livejournal!
http://sobeautyfool.livejournal.com
im sick of blogger, been using it for like, 5 years? mad.
add me people! exclusive entries for friends only. (:
(yes this mean you roy, loong etc hahahaha go get an account)

okay see you all around (:

2007-06-23T13:08:00.000+08:00

my life is so miserable! few months without my beloved cookies!
cookies please wait for me, after july i will eat you up.

2007-06-22T21:52:00.000+08:00

74.
im very scared.
please please please please please.

2007-06-20T14:56:00.000+08:00

i like this song. i dislike the singer.

Stars are blind- Paris Hilton

I don't mind spending some time
Just hanging here with you
Cuz I don't find too many guys
That treat me like you do
Those other guys all wanna take me for a ride
But when I walk their talk is suicide
Some people never get beyond their stupid pride
But you can see the real me inside
And I'm satisfied, oh no, ohh

Even though the gods are crazy
Even though the stars are blind
If you show me real love baby
I'll show you mine

I can make you nice and naughty
Be the devil and angel too
Got a heart and soul and body
Let's see what this love can do
Baby i'm perfect for you

My love, ohh oh

I could be your confidante
Just one of your girlfriends
But I know that love's what you want
If tomorrow the world ends
Why shouldn't we be with the one we really love?
Now tell me who have you been dreaming of
At night at home? oh no, ohh

Even though the gods are crazy
Even though the stars are blind
If you show me real love baby
I'll show you mine

I can make you nice and naughty
Be the devil and angel too
Got a heart and soul and body
Let's see what this love can do
Baby i'm perfect for you

Excuse me for feeling
This moment is critical
Might be me feeling
It could get physical, oh no, no no

Even though the gods are crazy
Even though the stars are blind
If you show me real love baby
I'll show you mine

I can make you nice and naughty
Be the devil and angel too
Got a heart and soul and body
Let's see what this love can do
Let's see what this love can do
Baby I'm perfect for you

Baby I'm perfect for you

Even though the gods are crazy

Even though the stars are blind

Even though the gods are crazy

Even though the stars are blind
----

i think retail therapy is the best way to make someone happy!
i bought this lime green eyeliner. the new hot.
and oh this retro big polka-dotted hairband! i like.
(:

by the way im very sorry i dint reply many people's smses.
my sms capacity kind of exceeded! by alot actually.
quite a rare thing cos i don usually like to sms huh.

you know i really await the day i can travel in a foreign country just on my own.
just that moment of forgetting the rest of the world
that would be good enough.

2007-06-16T16:43:00.000+08:00

old + new pictures

im finally uploading those pictures, anyway i think i look different in diff pictutes
weird uh, maybe i have split personality.

dance night! ppg with our lovely angie the pretty chinese dancer in the middle.

thursdays are massage days, bored us took a few pictures too.
clara and i camwhored quite alot, but im just putting a few here
anyway, on a side note, i love clara! we like talked about almost everything
even tho we are only training together for such a short time
heehee :D but tmr is some stupid race which i so am not prepared to run

anyway i mentioned this camp right. some pictures cheryl and i took!

i looked weird in this. no idea why.

anyway yesterday so like i came down for this photoshoot for some post card thing
at first they said 'backdrop' and then james said postcard, i was like !
okay its part of the project thing. ranjeet (this overall incharge of y2y network or sth)
chose some of us to be on the post card thing, which is like
2 very very hot female models (nicolette and some other ang moh girl)
2 other male models (eric and ryan)
and then uhh, cheryl and i. -.-
what kind of contrast is this. hot vs ......

hmm, anyway i think i looked spastic in that shot, was asked to wear shades.
oh and there was this other shot too, for quite a few pple for this video tribute to y2y
yea. KC the photographer specifically cut out my face in one shot
in which im supposed to look shocked,
lol cos uhh, my eyes were like so big, in that shot
so big it looked retarded.

okay anyway so here are the pictures taken yesterday! quite fun. (:

i think sylvia is a very funny and cute person
shes like so much more animated than me. hahaha.

james! the very capable man in y2y network
and also the man that always run to school late with me

janica, my secondary school classmate, also in y2y, one of the leaders
haha why am i not surprised, head prefect of cedar.

i looked retarded in this pic cos janica said 'pose something else!'

oh yes and you know this necklace i was wearing,
my brother won it at a lucky draw! 7 year old press some button
and got this sookee jewellery :D he gave it to me! so sweet right
and its from the man i love (my brother). lol

pictures are better viewed in xanga cos it will be the original size.
then again some people may think otherwise... HAHA.

oh yea i think the reason im being so strong in spite of everything
cos i have no time to break down or be emo or whatsoever.

by the way, im seriously thinking my common tests will be ggxxed.

and so is my track.

i think life really sucks when you have Alevels waving at you at an not-far-away end.

2007-06-11T19:03:00.000+08:00

hello hello. sorry for lack of updates.
i think everyone wants to kill me already right, all moulding their knives.
anyway life is boring, last week we had camp. i mean some of us.
some camp invited by james, cheryl and i went
the lecture-style of some leadership skills/entrepreneurship really made us zzzz
okay but at least we got to make some friends,
and! there are cedarians there too, (:

second day was slightly better, if slight is defined as the progress im making in anything.
tho there is this photoshoot thing that supposed to bring out your confidence..
more like bring out your stupidity! i cant pose in front of so many pple for nuts.
and they showed the pics to the rest asdfghjklwertyui
third day was old folks home, and then have to embark on some project
i dunno if i should say the third day is the best or worst.
cos im having headache now thanks to a certain person

i think some things are better left unsaid undone and at that,
but once too close for comfort it may actually destroy the beauty that was originally there.

i hope things will get better.

run faster! no time already

2007-06-09T14:37:00.000+08:00

the fairytale
when the clock strikes twelve
everything will be back to what it used to be
back to reality.

i should be smart enough to understand.
charm doesn't get you anywhere; it doesn't last.
but what lies beneath the skin do.
im so glad im not disillusioned.

2007-06-02T23:59:00.000+08:00

maybe i should stop being so emo huh. lol.
anyway i have a phobia of climbing the gates.
sneaking in and out of rj climbing the locked gates
was certainly not for the faint hearted!

introducing the two sneakers [not the shoes]
miss lee cai jing and lim sui hui :D
were training at macritchie on sat morning
and the rest go uh huh uh huh

full of fun and <3 and sugar and spice
sadly i missed spongebob marathon tho. :(
after a treat of pretty pictures
[i would like to think they are pretty]
one retarded photo for you then!

2007-06-01T15:33:00.000+08:00

save my dying heart. nothing motivates me anymore

2007-05-28T23:40:00.000+08:00

someone tries to add me on xanga friends
ahahhaa nice of you, but can tell me who you are?
your nickname doesnt sound like anybody i know....
and i dint accept your request, very sorry! :(

something nice for you all tho!
http://gallery.mobile9.com
go download nice themes for your handphone!
(select your own handphone model)
its super exciting, i downloaded quite a few for my new phone!

k the new phone is quite okay, but the themes are exciting.
lol i downloaded pirates, spiderman, HAPPY TREE FRIENDS :D, powerpuffgirls, simpsons etc!
the cartoons are SUPER CUTE, and the themes are very cool.
HTF one has their theme song as ringtone too. ahahha.
tralala my treat for reading my blog (:
courtesy of my sis! she introduced me this website.
im currently using the pirates one, but i always switch the themes lol
all too pretty already.

and my entries are not emo or remo or whatever kay wenloong -.-

trainings are pretty bad for me nowadays. legs can you run faster.
but trainings are getting exciting tho! we are having massaging after trgs from thurs
massaging for each other right? i think. lol reminded me of cedar trgs
when i was in great demand with my great massaging skills hohoho
but maybe the skills died off...
i shall download more themes
theme-crazy already, then can go theme park!
lame.

ohyea and some of the screensavers/gif images i downloaded, look!

this is some shit HAHA. kinda reminded me of jie/khing

patrick so cute (:

okay this is sweet.

spongebob! another one reminded me of jie,
so i set this one as his contact picture
so it means whenever he calls i will a see a spongebob jumping.

retarded. roy's contact pic.

baoyue's! she loves shinchan.

hahahhaha retardeddddd.

happytreefriends! my current screensaver and startup screen
now you know what kind of things goes into my mind

okay if you found nice gif images send me kay (: byebye!

2007-05-27T12:41:00.000+08:00

the whole of last night i was indulging myself in, love songs!
hahaha what a way to spend the night, but the songs are so beautiful!
and was watching youtube MVs on various dramas

look! my favourite one. do view it even if it loads pretty long!
i loveee the second song especially, and those couples were so sweet!
i hope it doesnt alarm you, but i have watched almost all
of the dramas featured in the video, aint that scary!

dont be lazy and click the play button lol.
anyway im getting a new phone today! cos its time for upgrading.
oh yes finally, my present phone is pretty annoying sometimes.
and pictures! i can take pictures with the new phone
and songs. oh my life is getting exciiitinggg. haha right.

anyway loong is having an headache and all, all pray for him!
that he can get well soon and so able to train well tmr and the whole of june

you know i laugh at my own foolishness sometimes.

2007-05-26T15:13:00.000+08:00

oh yes and i forgot
congratulations to all the sports ccas!
soccer rugby tennis bowling netball badminton hockey softball waterpolo tabletennis gymnastics
its so amazing for us to win nine golds in two days
(but where's the half day off)
this season you've worked hard and for the other ccas
we are also very proud of you! because gold is just the bonus
but what matters is we have done our all (:
if im not wrong i think we have at least 14 golds so far

and hopefully like what roy said,
'let track and field wrap up the golds for this sports season' (:

18th july. see you there.

2007-05-26T11:18:00.000+08:00

im so happy looking at the pile of work on my bed -.-
holidays are here.. not. what we have are days of insanity
well maybe i may start to like studying....
my social life shall be happily dedicated to my trainings
will be seeing more of my teammates than my boyfriend
oh gasp! do i have a boyfriend?!

you know i was so close to strangling cheryl's shawn yesterday
cos he was irritating the hell out of me.

anyway something about pirates
if you haven watch and has the intention to, dont read the blue box
dont say i dint warn you:

how many ten years do we have?
how would you feel if you know you are only going to see that someone special only a few more times in your life, with each time you being ten years older, and when so much has happened?
ten years ago i was still a retarded kid with no worries about the world, and ten years later i may be a woman either single married alive or dead. and the next ten and the next ten. oh goodness i think it sucks when you are unable to feel someone's presence for such a long time.

then again like a friend said, sometimes just an extra day earned with someone is just so valuable.
which reminded me of the song, one more day- lonestar

Last night I had a crazy dream
A wish was granted just for me
It could be for anything
I didn’t ask for money
Or a mansion in malibu
I simply wished, for one more day with you

(Chorus)
One more day
One more time
One more sunset, maybe I’d be satisfied
But then again
I know what it would do
Leave me wishing still, for one more day with you

First thing I’d do is pray for time to crawl
Then I’d unplug the telephone
And keep the tv off
I’d hold you every second
Say a million “I love you”s
That’s what Id do, with one more day with you

(Chorus)

Leave me wishing still, for one more day
Leave me wishing still, for one more day
---
very beautiful song, go download it!
and yes i agree sometimes a day alone with someone special will beat one thousand more days
with anybody else ordinary. unfortunately everyone in this world just seems to take things for granted huh. if only we know what is cherishing what we have. tell someone you love him or her before its too late. yes like as if there's no tomorrow! argh i bet no one is listening. lol.

anyway pirates is nice, go watch it!
i dint have enough cash for dinner and somebody had to pay for me =.=
so sorry and so thankful! thanks for everything (:

(so there.)

2007-05-23T21:10:00.000+08:00

nice song> all my life- ki ci jo jo

and all my life I've prayed for someone like you
and I thank God that I, that I finally found you
all my life I've prayed for someone like you
and I hope that you feel the same way too
yes, I pray that you do love me too

i found an interesting discovery involving handphone numbers.
general paper was like! !!!!
i think almost the whole entire batch wrote on qn 12,
which is a question on globalisation.
would do the qn 'what can we learn from mathematics?' if i want to fail gp
i would just answer 'nothing!'
you know im kidding right. i dont want to get killed.

we made so many balloons for the kids at kkh today my nails hurt like crazy
but im expert in making some balloons! swords, dogs!
just made for my brother he is such a happy boy
i dont make it just for anybody kay.

anyway j8 basement has many more little food outlets! just opened
anything concerning food just interests me. if only there is a subject call food.

2007-05-19T12:57:00.000+08:00

hello. i smell of mango.
cos i used mango shower gel from the body shop
which i bought yesterday, was using olive for quite a while.
mango smells very nice.

this is such a pointless entry.

anyway soccer guys were great yesterday! i dint watch tho.
heard from nicole it was very exciting, it went into the penalties.
penalties are always exciting, maybe they should just have the penalties for soccer.
anyway it was zhong who scored in the last penalty, grats!
(was asking him who was the guy who scored and he replied 'err me' lol.)
hockey girls won to clinch third yesterday.
cheryl said she was very touched by my flower cos she never receive one.
(tsk shawn what have you been doing)

i realised i used two parenthesis today. omg gp!

2007-05-16T18:05:00.000+08:00

even if the whole world does not believe in you,
never, stop believing in yourself.
even if the road ahead is long and arduous,
rest if you must, but never, give up.

i know there are people who think that i cannot do it,
but no dont change your views, you are the people i need to motivate myself to prove wrong.
maybe at the end of the day you will still be the ones laughing
but i know that i will try better than my best,
and no one should discriminate the one who try
even if im tired, even if im disheartened i may cry
but after crying i will get up again.

-----
my dance exam was pretty screwed up! z especially the silver one.
the bronze was okay, the examiner smiled and said 'well done!'
i was actually quite glad, and before the silver the examiner asked bout me
and requested to take a picture with me! i was like honoured
(then again it may be she wants to show the people of UK the most retarded singaporean or sth)
then later the silver exam i kind of screw up my steps abit. ohwell.
anyway i left my dancing shoes at the studio, hahahahahhahahaha.

gp exam next wed! im so very not prepared.
and pirates 3 will be out next thurs! i want to watch.
i watched the pirates 2 last year and i must watch the pirates 3.
somebody do you get the hint. ha-ha-ha.

2007-05-13T15:00:00.000+08:00

Note to self: Ten Nos till August 07

- No cookies (sobs.)
- No fried No oil Less Sugar
- No ben & jerry/ haagen daaz ice cream
- No bubble tea or sugared drinks
- No lifts, take the stairs.
- No slacking, no integer 99 percent of effort
- No sleeping later than eleven
- No injury/ falling sick
- No complaining
- No negative thoughts/giving up

any offence of above you are more than welcomed to fine me for 1 buck for each offence.
like we all know, singapore is such a fine country.

anyway im talking to farrell now, he is still in a dilemma on whether to continue track not
haha seems like all the j2s are thinking the same thing, if only we all dont have A levels huh.

tmr is latin dance exam! ggxxyyzz. wish me luck!

2007-05-12T13:14:00.000+08:00

hello hello. i think im in a financial crisis now
cos i remembered i had some cash on me
and then now it mysteriously disappeared, to all the gifts and presents etc.

and i just killed an ant, seriously i wonder why ants exist for.

dance night was great! i loved the syf items.
especially by chinese dance, very captivating.
and dance night is when many scandals are discovered, tsk tsk tsk.
(im attempting to spam roy's blog exposing his scandal but apparently it's not working, damn.)

i want my track suit.

life will and must get better, i pray.
and i will cherish this chance, yes i will.

2007-05-10T22:08:00.000+08:00

if only i have what it takes, to be able to face any challenges that come to me
and be ready and be prepared.
if only im stronger, so that i would be undaunted come what may.
but i only can crumble when i could not deal with it.

it's been long since i felt so depressed, like dementors around me,
felt like you can never be happy again.
i do not want to have any regrets, but it seems to me that
im probably will have to forgo this chance to do something for a last time.
i pray for strength, because im so tired now.

allow me to cry till dawn, im not kidding.

2007-05-06T21:50:00.000+08:00

Vibe was okay, the dance performances were pretty good
and i think i wont go clubbing because from today i learnt that
i dislike crowds, i hate standing for too long
i dont like the feeling of unable to hear yourself
and i stare at strangers but dont speak to them.
okay most people i saw were rj people so they aren't really strangers...

samuel i hope you liked the flower tommy and i plucked off at the roadside for you.

and im so glad for samuel! for reasons i cannot state here
but yea all the very best sam! (:

my work volcano is roaring at me so byebye!

2007-05-05T13:30:00.000+08:00

my old blog referral showed something new today:
http://angelz2devilz.blogspot.com/

z is my creation that nice. want to move blog url also be more creative can
copy also dint remove my referral........ smart.

Paris Hilton is going to jail, 45 days. That's hot.
her tolerance level would be 4.5mins and she is probably getting out in 4.5 days,
by what-else-but-ching-ching-ching-money.

life is so fair i think it should get a tan. Not.

yesterday was great, went out with my godsister/jie/khing
quite fun alot of stupid jokes and i was so clumsy i hit my head.
whats surprising.
and we talked bout stuffs and ~~im going to avoid someone now cos its so embarrassing.~~
maybe i can bypass that stage if my skin grows thicker. grow skin grow!

everything seems to be going wrong for me right now
but may i quote an inspirational quote brought to class by khing's exclassmate
(who happened to be in rjc track and field now LOL.)
'the world may suck, and shit happens, but dont give up.'

2007-05-04T22:22:00.000+08:00

some things cannot be swept away under the carpet.
but i cant face you now.
to prevent any potential hurt inflicted upon.

2007-05-01T23:37:00.000+08:00

and im seriously craving for donuts
how i wish spiderman (or anybody) will get me one box of pretty donuts.
of course, they must be delicious too. duh.

2007-05-01T23:05:00.000+08:00

the best 3 achievements thing is just out to demoralize us.
abolish it! z.
my best three achievements:
1) laughing at my own jokes
2) attend lessons, late; better than never.
3) bring fruits for trainings.

or maybe i can try something like
'im may be ordinary with no achievement, but without ordinary people like me,
how do those extraordinary people stand out? i sacrifice it all for the glory of others.
i deserve nothing less than a nobel noble prize. thank you.'

im so funny i think i can scratch my toes.

and oh yes i want to watch spiderman 3! the trailer looked so gooood.

2007-04-27T20:36:00.000+08:00

i suddenly remembered bout my very old guestbook i used to have
and then i went to visit it and read its archives.
brought lots of memories and i dint know there are so many nice people in my lives
people who really care and who bother.

thats something i like bout guestbooks, they keep those tags!
unlike tagboards, the only reason i put it up was you people complaining.
and then i put it up you people are lazy to tag
okay maybe not so many people know bout my blog
but still. okay i shall switch back to guestbook yay.

anyway i never had a chance to find out who this tagger was: crushedd
super sweet and she[i think its a she] is like this little angel of my blog
always there, to encourage, to cheer me up, to show support:

cut and paste all these tags lol. so sweet right! it just makes your day
nowadays so many people like to hide behind those anonymous nicks
and hurl insults or unkind stuffs at people, with so few so few people
who anonymously make a little kind act. why is the world so cruel sometimes
why is it so easy to hurt someone to sin to say mean things
and so difficult to say something nice to do something good

okay i think indulgedd = crushhed. haha. they sound the same
haha and below was when i said nobody read my blog :/

i guess im a very lucky girl! never really experience spams
but no thanks don give me now. lol.

anyway heres some random tags that made me -_- (: or :D

im removing the tagboard so byebye tagboard!
sign my guestbook kay. ten tank tanks thanks.
anyway i removed the video and inserted a song
sorry kay i know songs in blogs very irritating but bear with it until im sick of it (:

okay feel a little bit sick! z. can i stop being so weak.
shall go rest well and stop wasting time
steph and i made many promises to ourselves and we're going to keep em
train hard train hard train hard train hard
no pain no gain no pain no gain

2007-04-24T23:14:00.000+08:00

i really love auntie anne's pretzels.
i knew it that a part of me died when the shop closed down in j8
pretzels make my day. yay.!

2007-04-22T20:30:00.000+08:00

uncle felix gave me this psychology book!
it was from one of his students, and like he knows i want to do psychology
its on children and adolescence
exactly the field i want to study
thanks a million! im gonna use it properly

sorlei and i were bitching bout her dance partner in the studio
all the time when her dance partner was like, 5m away! lol.
she is going to drop him as a partner soon, and he is not knowing
apparently he has actually danced for 5 years and he kept changing partners cos
'his dance partners get better than him' tho he said it was cos 'he was too tall'
saw them practice , sorlei was really good, and the guy was well, okay.anyway he is an angmoh, and i heard he is quite bitchy. haha

quite funny to see the two of them bicker, like alot.
it was super obvious the immense dislike sorlei has for her dance partner
from the way she talked to him and all

uncle felix: you all should come down for sunday lessons, see the whole studio so empty
angmoh: (at sorlei) ya we should, i think im able to, next sunday we are coming down
sorlei: (snapped) SHUT UP im not coming next sunday

damn funny. i dont even think i ever talk to my dance partner like that last time.
and she is from cedar! cedarians rock man.
and we both agreed that johnathan is really good (in dancing)

me: he is very good, like very.
sorlei: yes, VERY.
me: i can just watch him dance whole day
sorlei: he is like at this level (raised one hand high) and we all at this level can never reach

johnathan always amaze me each time he practise his dance
once i even secretly videoed some of his dance steps
and he is like, hot. and good looking.
him >>> rj boys
too bad he is 17 and he is from cjc and he has a gf and im too mediocre
ouch. nevermind im used to it already.

anyway dance exam is coming up! i think i can die
doing 4 dances in total for exam. and my jive is as good as my chemistry
which is NOT good if you are not enlightened.

2007-04-22T01:46:00.000+08:00

[click to enlarge]

the darlings that make my day, everyday.

timon is being very screwed up here haha.
narpal looks like a small boy!
we are the powerpuff family.
adnaan the mayor narpal the mojo jojo timon the iforgotwho
and kenny (not in pic) the professor! :D

i like this picture alot! (:

anyway i compiled all the pics and vid into a video
go watch

anyway my brother's birthday was on friday
and he got alot of presents from girls, tskkk.
one girl drew a card for him that wrote
'i ask natasha what she give you she said chocolate
i bring prize for you but i dont want let you know.'
SO CUTE. my brother's a lucky boy.
okay maybe not, cos he fell sick the next day eating too much chocolate.

2007-04-18T23:39:00.000+08:00

THANKS to everyone for all the smses handshakes greetings hugs cards and presents
every little thing you all did makes my day. (: really.
i have loads of pictures! there are some pictures not with me
so i will just upload those on mine first.

school was great because it was short. and im surprised there were so many people
who knew it was my birthday. pretty funny sight when all the 6B guys
said happy birthday after one another.
anyway i have famous amos cookies! so happy.
in a heart shaped box just like the one on this skin. so cool
courtesy of anqing beany angie rae! thanks so much. (:

cheryl and angie got me a pierre cardin wallet. totally smell of leather.
suddenly i feel so rich. im just kidding please don borrow money from me.
okay i have 2 wallets actually because my parents got me a GUESS wallet.
which looks so expensive i don even bear to like use it.
haha like what cheryl said, i can use it for like going out and stuffs.
if im going out that is.
but thanks so much i feel so pampered!
tho there isnt the need for such expensive stuffs huh.

anyway im bored, so yes lets talk bout the exciting things
nationals schools crosscountry!
i saw sooooo many people. excedarians, exrafflesians. exseniors.
exteammates. good friends. everybody.
was cheering together with the track and field team

i think steph and i were utterly stunned when we saw the vj girls
three of them, suihui including, ran for the finish together,
taking the first few positions.
when their 4th runner came in before alisa did,
we knew our title was gone.
it dint exactly sink in, it was kind of hard to accept.
tho i must say vj deserve the title more than anything,
they trained hard they fought hard and they run hard

and im proud of rj crosscountry team too. boys and girls.
yes because we all trained hard for this and whether
we have the title or not, it doesnt matter because we have gotten what is better
- the team spirit. love rjcrosscountryteam2007!

okay. pictures!

i love divya and steph! gossip partners during trainings, after chem remedial
all the yakun kaya toast sessions. all the warm ups and all the exercises.

my pretty juniors! i know you are all disappointed with your performances
but its okay there's still a year to go. make that last one the right one. (:

this team is so much stronger especially since we are so much closer to the juniors
bubbly nicole blur tiff adorable aud and crazy clar.
all so pretty! the canoeing j1 team likes to ogle at them
told by my mortal in the team. especially at tiff lol.
and apparently he told me
'they also think you are very pretty but they are very scared of you
cos they said you look grouchy when you never smile'
okay i shall uh, smile when i train next time.

alisa!!! our captain always and forever. so cute! i like alisa very much.

i really miss suihui. we hugged immediately after her race. haha so sweaty.
but we have been thru so much, and she inspires me even till now
im really proud of her today, and i will always be.
and yay i will be meeting this girl soon! to study together yay

okay now i know why all the 6B guys knew it was my birthday
so tommy carried the big takashimaya bag with the pig around in school
he said he looked very auntie. haha! but yes im very touched.
but i think im very mean. because in the end i made these 2 boys carried ALL my presents while i scurried off with steph to cheer take pics sing songs etc.
so evil right! okay i shall be nicer to them from now onwards. note to self.

i went to take pics with alot of loved ones!

mr low xide! (: im very proud of him today. cos he ran so well!
i look very happy here right. haha i always am cos xide never fail to make me smile. (:
yea all those fun times thru the years. i like to slack at his attic.
got the big big screen to watch! and the big big kangeroo!
and ac team are always so whacky. tho they tease both of us alot. like alot.

khing! jie! yes my godsister for 3 years already.
haha khing always do the ultimate unexpected.
tho it becomes so common its expected.
those long phone calls in sec school! sadly we are too busy for that now.
one day we shall go take neoprints again! hahahha.

loong! my closest teammate from the guys team.
knew him before i came to rj cos of khing.
this guy is very determined when he sets his eyes on things.
very inspiring. and he is very literature. thinks alot.
and he likes to make fun of me. then again its very fun those times.
like the incident of trying to hide while he walked off and chasing after him
and spoiling his slippers. and those long heart-to-heart talks.
so glad he is still training for track! jiayouuuuu.

farrell! know this guy since 2003. tho like very busy and all now
but still a close friend to heart. he is retiring from running now so all the best for As!

sadly i dint manage to take pics with quite a few others
like roy who went for tuition stupidly midway
like audrey yanni my exseniors like agnes like samantha like dhar like tasha etc
because i was quite stupid i actually realised i have a camera (my sister's)
after like, so long. so smart! hip hip hooray!

anyway so we had team dinner at pizza hut at bukit timah plaza!
got a free ice cream treated by pizza hut! sheng wei requested haha.
so cool. heh shared with divya and nicole.
steph divya nicole and i shared a table together with the track and field pple
they are super funny. especially sheng wei!
he is like ultra funny and lame and he reminds me of rong hua.
haha he was from vs last time anyway. and he is very smart.
heard he topped bio lecture test and he was shortlisted for moe scholarship
he said 'i made the interviewers laugh. is that a good thing'

oh and like the team was super sweet! they actually had a cake ready
haha so sneaky uhh they got the cake and hid it in pizza hut.
so touched! so many pple sang happy birthday to me! whee.
nicole brought the cake and walked to me and the team sang
pics of that in mel's cam. haha i was super touched even zheng hong was saying
'wahh caijing so happy' LOL. thanks team! love you all

the slice of the cake on my plate.
took quite alot pics with the trackers! haha the sprinters were like
'i want to take picture with the birthday girl' so cute.
but dunno somehow some of the pics went like missing? haha maybe dint save.

okay this is when i got really sick of photoshopping
so i merely adjusted the lighting and put in the words
so if the pictures damn bad quality too bad

sheng wei is seriously a cam-whore
he wants to take many pics till he looks good. HAHA

some of us started being silly:

weiwen is my junior who runs very fast (indiv 4th)
and also very nice to girls example tiff
and also do not like to go out with just guys because he thinks its gay

dont you think zh looks like sir standford raffles

okay so we said byebye around 10 plus! haha such obedient students
unlike the acsib team who got wasted outside suntec, haha right khing

lol this pic is random, taken from someone's blog
put it up cos its nice! and cos got 2 v impt pple inside lol.
very bonded team and very funny people
still rmb playung pool and soccer playstation at xide's attic with them!
and also eating mcdonalds near xide's house. yay fun.
hahahahahhaa kenneth seet is being blocked in the pic. awww.

im such a happy girl! love some of the presents
using the handphone pouch from alisa. very nice to touch
and super pretttyyyy butterfly hairclip and yay i got a perfume! (:
time to go 'seduce people' as said by wan ting. ha-ha-ha.

and this post is super long i took 2 days to type lol.
by the way, angie and cheryl did sth totally sweet on friday
[angie dint come sch on wed and i skipped first half of thursday]
okay i dint expect it, so thats why im sooooo touched!

they decorated level 6 of rj's classroom block with balloons
pasted with lots of messages like 'caijing is the fairest of them all'
and in each balloon there is a message inside.
so im supp to go and pop each one by one to collect all the messages.
omg it was very embarrassing because everybody came back from econs lecture
and i was walking with the group of people and then i saw angie and cheryl
and like i see them smirking at me and then i saw one balloon that says
'pop a balloon make a wish! ps> caijing only.'
and i looked and i saw many more balloons along the way i was like 'omg.'
angie took a vid of me popping one of the balloons! lol its spastic
will upload the pictures and the vid when she send to me

i collected in total of 14 messages! hahaha everybody was amused at me popping them
and the sweetest was this whole stretch of balloons with my name
each letter on each balloon, forming an arc in between 6B and 6C classrooms
SUPER PRETTY. SUPER NICE. SUPER TOUCHED.
thankyouuuu angie and cheryl!

:D :) (",) ^^ 8) HAPPY.

2007-04-17T20:09:00.000+08:00

my sister has finally removed her bandage
and now relies on a big plaster
no more 'very itchy' and other complaints.
okay was pretty worried for her the past few days
because we have to make sure the bandage is dry and clean
and that my sister couldnt walk and have to go around in her wheeling chair
and my brother is a very clumsy person who may accidentally kill my sister anytime
anyway its seven stitches! not 20. i knew my sister was exaggerating.
but still, one stitch to me is still a whole lot of pain
minus the fact that the wound hurts in the first place
and the scars that left after that. boohoo.
its okay sis your legs are still very sexy in your friends' opinion.

was pretty traumatized these days
hanuted by the images of the wound at night
and sometimes i feel like puking just thinking bout it
maybe its the medicine too, drowsy effect that made my head heavy whole day
okay im not exactly entirely recovered yet. better be by tmr.
and thanks to my sickness i missed today's ben & jerry free-cone-day!
ohwell. its okay i will treat myself some other time.

today is suihui's birthday! miss this girl alot.
but its okay i will be seeing her tmr, and cheering for her.
and maybe the priority in my family now is my sister's recovery
they seemed to forget that it's my birthday tmr :(
actually, it's just another day, nothing much.
in fact if i can choose i would rather go home and sleep whole day long.
but tmr is the day so gogogogo raffles!

2007-04-15T07:57:00.000+08:00

yesterday was a series of events i wished it never happened.
i dunno if i can reveal what exactly happened prior to the accident
but for those who wish to know and im comfortable with telling you
you can ask me personally.

anyway so something happened.
and it ended up my sister in the hospital
requiring 20 over [she said] stitches. and 5 injections near the wound before that.
okay it was one of the most gruesome wounds i had ever seen
all i know is that the moment my brother and i rushed over
the moment i saw such deep cut it cuts my heart immediately
and it was an instantaneous effect: my brother and i cried
i guess my brother was utterly horrified
i anxiously screamed at my brother to go away while he was still sobbing
apparenly my sister couldnt stop bleeding and she was bleeding for like 2/3hours
my fingers were full of her blood.
good thing it was a cut at the knee, not head, not face not whatever.
but still 20 over stitches and 5 injections. i dunno how my sister can go through that.
she told me she had to bear with the pain of the injections and the first stitch that she could feel
all just by biting her own shirt. i will never call her a wimp again.
okay that was a joke i never did call her that.
and the doctors said the blood clot was gone so that explained the non-stop bleeding

do you know i was terribly sick on friday night i dint think i would survive
and i thought i would end up at hospital that night but it turned out to be my sister for different reason. what is this.
and i have to accompanied her alone to the hospital cos they only allowed one in the ambulance
and i waited for few hours waiting for my sister outside the critical care room
and i thought i was going to faint; my lips were white and i was so giddy
my fever returned to its new high. i was so irritated with myself getting sick at this time.
anyway dad wanted me to go home so my mum came down
i told cheryl last week i wanted to have an early birthday celebration with my family
on saturday.
but it turned out i was sick and my sister like that.
i cried so badly when i reached home. because my mum dint give me the key.
and nobody is at home. and i have enough of waiting. and i was still upset about everything.
so i cried. badly. never cried so badly in my entire life, right outside my locked door.

but anyway i went to see a doctor in the end, in the night with dad.
i feel much better now.

now she is at home fully bandaged and we need crutches anybody can lend?
and yea she is going to be out of school for 2 whole weeks,
i think she's quite happy to skip the napfa
but she said she'd rather go through napfa than all this stupid pain. duh.
on tuesday she has to go down the hospital again
to see if there is continued bleeding beneath the stitching
i pray not. please. i cant undo what has been done. but please allow her to recover.
i dont want anything on my birthday already. i just want her to recover.
she is still very much in pain now and i wish i can at least reduce her pain or something.
im such a lousy sister i think i suck okay.
cos if im a good one maybe i could have prevented the accident in the first place.
please pray she will recover.

2007-04-13T11:10:00.000+08:00

[mood: grumpy]
[music: all good things- nelly furtado]

so like, i dint go to school today
oh on wednesday too. sore throat fever etc

nothing interesting happened! haha must be lack of schooling
oh! i was told my pw grp got a B for pw. zzzz so much for doing so much.
only one group in my class got an A. oh well!
not that i need the pw grade anyway. hopefully.

so like napha created a muscle-ached me.
even when i sneeze or cough, which i unfortunately am doing quite alot
thanks to my sickness, and my stomach goes ouch!
yesterday's training killed me too.
but yay, this is the last napfa ever!
& i dint fail standing board jump! double yay.

ohyea there's some dxo dance thing right? chunkiat was telling me bout it.
he is performing with his nyp dance crew i think.
but it was organised by rjc? haha how come i dint know.
anyway this boy wants me to go, and sam too,
so okay maybe im going. (:

okay im going school later for some remedials and meeting steph later to do stuff
watch the vid! the song's super nice.

Wanting you to be wanting me
No that ain’t no way to be
How I feel, read my lips
Because I’m so over
(I'm so)
Movin’ on, it’s my time
You never were a friend of mine
Hurt at first, a little bit
But now I’m so over
I’m so over it

2007-04-06T16:26:00.000+08:00

[mood: slacking]
[music: get up-ciara feat. chamillionaire]

wish-list!

i need:
a cross necklace.
handbags (i have no handbag, ouch.)
wallets! (mine spoilt)
hair accessories [(cherries, dragonfly, butterfly, heart) (chomel)]
pretty necklaces! (cherries, dragonfly, butterfly, heart)
books on christianity
books on psychology, human behavior, workings of brains
The Lovely Bones novel
perfumes! (chanel, thebodyshop)
makeups! (eyeliner)

i want:
famous amos cookies!
post-secret book
flowers
big brown bear!
white top from zara
chanel sunglasses
video cam! (daddddddddddy pretty please.)
ipod!

though i think more than half of the list will remain needs and wants
but i dont care its pretty fun listing them out
and i dint realise only after listing that im such a materialistic bitch HAHA.
actually the most important thing is for your loved ones to be safe and happy!
and im meeting so many loved ones on my birthday without having to invite
im already so lucky okay.

ohyea i updated my youtube account the link's on the left

oh i almost got chased out of rj library yesterday due to laughing what a joke
stephanie couldnt stop laughing when she heard that

anyway i think im going to get toally owned for this sunday's race
and im having 2.4 napfa the next day ggxx.
i can kiss the track.

2007-04-04T17:52:00.000+08:00

[mood: ooh-laa-laa.]
[music: Over it- Katherine Mcphee]

my retarded brother

so retarded right! well, thats my brother for you.
anyway quite a few people put up wish-lists prior to their birthdays
easier for friends i guess. maybe i shall put one too
1)stars
2)moon
3)trip to mars
get them for me okay

okay i will put a real one soon, provided that im still living happily.
happily.

2007-04-01T22:48:00.000+08:00

[mood: no idea.]
[song: remember- stairway to heaven ost]

the last part of the fifth paragraph of loong's email to the team
actually made me tear.
because he touched on one sensitive issue that is bugging me
and probably
some of the guys as well.
its nice to know that your effort is seen and appreciated,
even when it doesn't seem to pay off.

and yes, on 18th april, rjc cross team is going to show them what it takes to win.
i will be cheering! loudly! & of course, singing my birthday song secretly as well.

2007-03-30T14:59:00.000+08:00

[mood: crestfallen]
[music: everything in its time- corrinne may]

Sometimes I wonder what lies ahead
How long till my hunger is fed
They say it's hard to make it in this part of town
So many people on this merry-go-round

its not easy to be a superhero.
sometimes i wish life isn't so complicated.
then again its myself who made it to be.

its very disheartening when your effort does not pay off.
i'm struggling now, i feel like giving up, i have no more strength.
i feel like cutting off those strings attached.

I often feel like I'm two steps behind
Somebody must have moved that finish line
There are a thousand reasons
Why I should give up

and when will i reach the end of the song?

The river runs and the river hides
Out to the ocean and under the sky
I promise you, the answer will come
Hold on to patience and watch for the sign
Everything in its time

2007-03-28T17:02:00.000+08:00

mind your manners.

seriously, they should have that column in the newspapers.
in just one train ride with barely less than 5 stops,
i was pushed by like four men at different stops, indicating that
i was blocking their way and they were very irritated.
okay im usually very nice, and you know nice people are always being bullied.
not even once did any of these idiots say excuse me
or signaled that they wanted to get out of the train
but, they merely pushed me out of the way, as though i have eyes ON MY BACK.
like i was that stupid to not understand one million's excuse me
no, one merely grunted as he pushed past me
the other shot me a dirty look as he pushed past me
i wouldnt even care less bout these insignificant people
but the ultimate came at the last one when this indian
slapped me twice on my arm, hard, real hard
and while i was still recovering from the shock and stood one side,
he growled at me like a tiger would at its prey.
i felt violated. no one has the right to hit/touch anybody,
and especially not someone you dont know.
seriously. its not like i was standing right in the middle of the exit.
i was standing right far behind, near the other door of the cabin.
i dont understand why people would choose to be angry be irritated
when they dint even bother to signal that they wanted to get out of the train?
and i thought it would be just the men, but as i walked towards a seat
still covering my arm because it hurt, this middle-aged woman
shouted at this poor secondary school girl
'aiyo dont block my way!!!!'
the girl was only blocking 1/4 of the exit, the 3/4 was clear.

i dont know if i should say Singaporeans are rude or just plain idiots.

if the government really want to encourage the usage of public transport
the thing they should do is to change the attitude of these damned Singaporeans.

just my plain unlucky day, i failed chem test!
and its not like i dint study. all the more i should kill myself.

2007-03-25T20:49:00.000+08:00

[mood : perplexed]
[music: walk me home- mandy moore]

friends we are,
friends we will be,
friends forever
you and me.

the future can be so uncertain that you are so afraid of changes.

2007-03-23T22:59:00.000+08:00

[mood: mixture of everything.]
[music: if you come to me- atomic kitten]

okay im completely exhausted from all day of talking laughing and walking
even my blister at the back of my right foot bled, oh the pain.
met divya suelynn ivy roy sam for lunch at breeks!
consumption of lots of fats, like seriously i need to slim down.
anyway suelynn! not sure if you will read this but
there are alot of things out there worth waiting for
come what may, embrace it with grace!
kay it rhymes.

then it was mrbeansholiday movie with loong mok zhenghong.
mr bean is just purely retarded. laughed like nobody's business.
then met cheryl who had grade 8 piano exam earlier; she said she's going to fail
window shopping around, i spotted this really hot white dress at zara!
but couldnt find it in the shop :( and i was afraid to ask the salesgirls
dinner was lots of chatting; loong and cheryl talked like best friends like that
cheryl left for cell; loong and i went to kino to read magazines.
okay i bought a psychology today magazine! how cool is that.
im really interested to do psychology in university, haha we shall see.

something loong said was pretty amusing and set me thinking
and if what he said was true, then i must be pretty ignorant these 3 years.
or probably, i just do want to think of the unlikely. or rather afraid to.

khing got first for 800m! congrats (: xide dint place my bet. :(

thanks to every single person who contributed to a wonderful today,
and no, physics paper is not a person.

2007-03-21T22:33:00.000+08:00

[mood: i dont feel like studying.]
[music: girlfriend- Avril Lavigne]

i think girlfriend song is really cute! for full lyrics click here.

Hey! Hey! You! You!
I know that you like me
No way! No way!
No it’s not a secret
Hey! Hey! You! You!
I want to be your girlfriend

2007-03-19T22:56:00.000+08:00

[mood: retarded]
[music: la-la-la love song - boA & soul d'out]

im going to stay in econs remedial even after the cts. hello again miss long-hair.
anyway after being drained mentally i went on to drain myself physically
did five-hundreds for training today. the weather killed me.
must be due to the increase in carbon dioxide gas emissions. okay not funny.
and loong work hard at it okay you will hit timing for the set real soon!
i see how hard you work for all this, in changing your lifestyle and all
i will always be behind you, literally.
anyway stayed back after that to do a card with samuel
which i destroyed much to my disdain.
its okay its the thought that counts.
oh by the way, got my christmas present from jie today! im a happy girl
i cant wait for friday. though i will be quite screwed on thursday night
training till late and physics paper on friday morning! i love my life
and yes suihui i miss you too! lets go for high tea soon

2007-03-16T19:08:00.000+08:00

[mood : empty]
[song: bad day- daniel powter]

got stung by a bee before the race. like what are the chances man.
screwed up the race. dint feel anything tho.
maybe im numb to losing already. numb being me.
okay the ~~stung~~ sting hurts. less swollen tho. may it kills me tonight.
goodbye, cruel world.

2007-03-15T00:34:00.000+08:00

[mood: worried]
[music: no mood to listen to music]

friday. friday. friday.
one last time. one last chance.
to make it right.

okay im very scared.

2007-03-11T12:48:00.000+08:00

[mood : lazy]
[music: wonderful tonight- Eric Clapton ]

my eyelashes are still long and curvy. ahh, the effects of waterproof mascara.
need to get some lotion to wash them off soon.
quite a trouble to rub them off.

anyway, last night was sing yean's bdae party

timbre at cityhall, right opposite smu.
sing yean dressed up very hot ((: wonder whose beauty this gonna be :D
food was great. love the atmosphere, serene with a tinge of punk [there's band]
sat with the 6b guys together with cheryl. haha they are a funny bunch.

alexyap took off his shirt! for a bet of 8 bucks. easy money.

the band was great too. sang wonderful tonight dedicated to sing yean.
chasing cars! live bands are just different.
topped with great food and drinks. drank apple juice.
the whole table of guys drank beer and cocktails. like plain water.
wonder if any of them was actually drunk. adrian was asking if he looked red.
well he did, he wore a red shirt. ha-ha.
ben lim asked to go for some smoking dunno what thing after that. lol!
and quite funny he joked bout some bf gf thing, kay he was drunk. kidding.

and talked to some whom i never talk to before.
fun! tho there wasnt cards to play with.

wished i could have stayed longer, but it was kind of getting too late
wanted to go watch samuel and his crew nearby but by the time i was going to leave
his crew was packing up to leave. so, yea.
stayed to listen for one last song and left before they cut the cake. lousy.
reached home ard midnight. i sound like a cinderella.

which reminds me, happily n'ever after! hello i still want to watch go ask me out

found out something which got me disappointed in someone again.
though like what cheryl said, it was 'not surprising'.

and even if you return, you will realise im not here anymore.

Think before you make up your mind
You don't seem to realize
I can do this on my own
And if I fall I'll take it all
It's so easy after all

2007-03-10T12:55:00.000+08:00

[mood: zzzz.]
[music: 只对你有感觉- Hebe and Fahrenheit ]

oh great,this year's nationals schools crosscountry falls on my birthday,
oh very great.

should i be happy that it marks the end of my crosscountry career?
or should i be sad that im probably not running on that day?

i think i will be crying on that day
and its going to be more unbearable since i wont cry to not worry anyone.

and i fell on my right knee just now it hurt so bad i cried.
im so lousy.
it still hurts.

i wish my birthday will not come.

2007-03-07T22:03:00.000+08:00

[mood : tired]
[music: want you back- mandy moore]

i signed in to my second msn account.
maybe its easier to talk to people you dont know.
GP drained me. dont compare results with me im going to get the lowest for it.
i dont feel like going to school tomorrow.

& in the end, im probably writing a card i will never send.

2007-03-06T20:08:00.000+08:00

[mood : melancholic]
[music : beautifully broken- ashlee simpson]

i wonder if last minute studying for GP will actually help.

http://www.happilyneverafterthefilm.com/

such an adorable movie! i shall watch it after friday
anybody else watching
anybody else watching
anybody else watching

intervals-from-hell is crazy. hurt my back while running up the slope.
anyhows, divya stephanie and i are still going to visit lovely macritchie after As
though we shall run with the pace of stephanie's, gossip through the trail
and settle down right in front of the sea, oh the lovelies.

you know i really cant wait for all this to end.

physics spa was okay. cheryl and i took an hour to memorize the whole thing.
chem lecture test was alright. cheryl predicted 10 marks for her score.

alighted this bus yesterday which someone actually boarded from the same stop.
wanted to call out to, but where's the courage.
pride seemed to take over, in spite of every urge to talk.
maybe im just afraid it isnt mutual.
like if i talk to you and you don want to talk anymore.

2007-03-04T18:43:00.000+08:00

[mood: stressed]
[music: miss independent- kelly clarkson]

the highway got to be real bumpy cos i have difficulties to carry on.
things next week:

physics spa
IFH-intervals from hell
chem lect test
gp common test
last day of term one

and i have to study during the holidays! great. im really loving school.
okay at least i do not have soccer camp/hockey camp.
count my blessings.

and i was thinking if i really die please have me one white christian funeral
and no solemn pics i hate solemn pics look so retarded
three prettiest pics of me! like this taiwanese actress who passed away this year.
yes im vain even if im dead.

okay no im not going to die. im going to lead an exciting life!
oh, right oh right.

2007-03-03T17:42:00.000+08:00

[mood : zealous ]
[music : come clean - hilary duff]

okay everyone is crazy. or at least the rafflesians. my seniors.
whichever. how to get freaking 3/4 As. thats. like. 100 minus my-promos-scores
my ogl sergius was like one of the top scorers. hes mad. i think he can get the president's scholarship.
anyway come to think of it, i cant wait for As to really end.
then come holidaying with cheryl and gie (US! paris! london!)
suntanning shopping and sight-seeing okay fine i mean hunk-seeing
and cheryl is going to regret shes attached [boohoo.]
and then over with jobs jobs jobs! which is kind of exciting i must say
why why why of cos you get to see pple. many pple. and you get to like work. for fun.
nicholas [my ex-cross-senior who went to tabletennis] was like a photographer
wahlauu i said it was damn fun he said no. spoiler.
and interviews! i mean with universities youre applying for.
okay and like yea university lives are eggggcitinggg.
hopefully i will be able to study overseas. yes. okay mug hard.
i must lead an exciting life after the As to ensure my every bit of sacrifice is worth it.
alright driving on a highwayyyy!

on a second note, met a close friend today!
friends for 8 years. live at the same area same pri sch same sec sch.
shes happily attached now! you dunno how happy im for her.
its an amazing feeling.
she used to say i would get attached first. ha-ha.
today, she: 'i think you wont get attached so soon. you have many choices.'
many choices? isnt it just a yes, or no?

2007-03-02T20:44:00.000+08:00

(every little thing reminded me of you.)

im afraid to ask, for im afraid to know the answer.

2007-03-01T22:51:00.000+08:00

'love the heart that hurts you,
but never hurt the heart that loves you.'

i was hurt by someone i love. but i, in turn, hurt this person.
i dont feel good, no not at all.

2007-02-28T22:28:00.000+08:00

saw a movie ad today
call 'Happy Never After'! cartoon movie
ah, the perfect kind of movie for people like me.

2007-02-27T21:45:00.000+08:00

~~i need a shoulder to cry on. badly.~~

thanks roy. (: though you arent physically there but thanks for talking much sense into me and staying up to crap with me! i will make sure my heart will not ache when i wake up tmr. (:

2007-02-27T19:12:00.000+08:00

before i fall in love.

My heart says we've got something real
Can I trust the way I feel
'Cause my heart's been fooled before
Am I just seeing what I want to see
Or is it true, could you really be

(chorus)
Someone to have and hold
With all my heart and soul
I need to know,
before I fall in love
Someone who'll stay around
Through all my ups and downs
Please tell me now
Before I fall in love

I'm at the point of no return
So afraid of getting burned
But I want to take a chance
Please give me a reason to believe
Say, that you're the one
That you'll always be

(repeat chorus)

It's been so hard for me
To give my heart away
But I would give my
everything
Just to have you say

(repeat chorus)

you know. sometimes you wish you can have it all back. but you know you couldnt.
because things have changed and the only thing is to move on and forget.
and all that was left would be reduced to nothing. goodbye.
is there anyone to heal this injured soul.

2007-02-26T23:36:00.000+08:00

i love the people who make me smile today.
thanks loong roy stephanie cheryl and youknowwho
because its you people thats why im holding on. (:

2007-02-25T20:08:00.000+08:00

okay got pple complain my posts are boring.
hello here's an exciting entry. e x c i t i n g. the end.
anyway, things will get better. at least i pray so.
[i broke a new for running today :D]
im working hard for everything now, studies dance run.
okay maybe not so much for studies huh. [im blogging instead of mugging]
you know what motivates you to work hard?
it is when you do it because you want to
and not because you have to. geddddiiit.
get out of your comfort zone.

alright this is exciting, the old caijing is back.

ps. my tagboard is rather dead, and in case you dunno of its existance see the top of this page.
pps. but less than 10 knew bout this blog, so why am i complaining.
ppps. okay time to stretch my [aching] legs.

2007-02-24T16:26:00.000+08:00

Misused, mistakes. Too long, too late.

2007-02-23T22:11:00.000+08:00

you don appreciate the concern?fine i take it back.
it's so easy being a bitch
so much easier to be hated than to be loved.
so hate me, yes. cos i hate myself too.

2007-02-22T22:44:00.000+08:00

i think it's so difficult to mask your feelings towards someone.
but yet you are so afraid of facing the consequences if you dont.

i shall, keep my mouth shut
even if it's hurting me.

ohwait what feelings? i dont have feelings.

2007-02-20T18:32:00.000+08:00

'if you laugh non-stop for 5 minutes, you will have abs.'

thanks for all the laughter today guys! even if it means being really retarded.

2007-02-19T12:50:00.000+08:00

my roses are all withered :( time to peel off the petals and play the 'he loves me not' game!
anyway, cheryl updated her blog, like wow.
and it would be funny on how i found out that she did.
hahaha okay only samuel knows why. lol.

anyway some photohunt game for you:
my old blog: http://ppathetique-.blogspot.com
some loser's blog: http://simplicity-gurll.blogspot.com
you see the heart shape thing at the top left corner? cliiick it.
unless ure really dumb then fine here's the link you'll get after clicking
:http://souldreamerz.blogspot.com

some people can just be so bored huh.

fame gets irritating and disturbing after awhile so aye all people out there
stop uploading benny and samuel's vids and all when you don have their permission
well tell me if you like it if ure quarrelling with you good fren/bf/gf and someone took a vid and upload on youtube okay that aint a good analogy but you get my drift
alright thanks have a good day

2007-02-18T13:16:00.000+08:00

let's commit a crime; you steal my heart and i'd steal yours.

sis`heels`mum`cheryl`sara`mortal! <3
i realise my mum and sis like to purse their lips when they take pics uh huh.

2007-02-17T22:57:00.000+08:00

take.5 at ccab, good job council (:
even tho i dint get to try many stuffs. like bouncing castle. -.-
and it closed right in front of me, oh right.
cheryl got balloons for me! and who flew 'em away? (: thanks benny!
okay i shall forgive you for trying to accompany me to bounce the castle
hahaha ohwell balloons can be irritating anyway.
helped out at biathlon! glad things turned out well and uhh congrats keth benlim txa!
only managed to watch talentine, missed narpal's band tho [thanks to biathlon]
anyway they said triad dint deserve to win. but i did think they were good.
whether the singer's character is full of shit i dont really care bout that.

and i was thinking whether it makes a difference whether i went for class lunch or not.
haha ohwell! we cant expect much from a MASS LUNCH anyway. like it ever helps.
okay but it was fun playing photohunt with the class guys at the arcade after that tho
sadly we dint break zhong's score. damn.

today was fun! i pwned somebody in scissors paper stone :D

2007-02-15T22:02:00.000+08:00

no scratch that. im not going to cry over my pathetic state.
i will be like a bouncing ball,
push me further down and i will bounce up higher.
i will.

2007-02-15T21:18:00.000+08:00

why like that :(

2007-02-14T22:02:00.000+08:00

i feel so loved [and fat] this valentine.
thanks a million to annoymous who sent me a rose,
and your note was so sweet i think i can get diabetes. (:

was back from dinner date with sara-ann!
heres a love poem she got for me:

by L. Carling
Candles flicker softly at this table set for two
there's no one in the world except for me and you

a nice romantic dinner and a bottle of chilled wine
and here we are together in a moment stopped in time

a love so few have ever known and this is its birth night
alone within our little world, you and i and candlelight

so soon we will set free the feelings we want to share
and i am held here spellbound by your laughter in the air

thoughts of love like falling leaves
swirling in the autumn breeze

flow in our minds and in our eyes
a tender look and longing sighs

we touch and as the fire starts
that we have kindled in our hearts

we kiss and hear the angels sing
as heavens gift to me you bring

no more to live my life along
and in your soul i found my home

at peace within your loving arms
captivated by your charms

and happily i'd die for you
here at this table set for two.

2007-02-11T11:21:00.000+08:00

HSM- When There Was Me And You

valentine's day coming, yucks.

2007-02-10T18:40:00.000+08:00

i bought new sunglasses today its funkay.
and uhh one black top and one pair of white shorts. and one pair of high heels. all for cny.
okay still have one more set of clothes to shop for tho. wait till frrriiday.
which is take five which is i-luff-at-others-eating-oranges day which is doing duty for biathlon day

there was this indian teacher at my volunteering session today
who is real funny i think she can be my gp tchr's best friend

indian tchr: yesterday i went out shopping with few others and we were sitting at the bus stop chitchatting. waited for bus 518 from 8-830. so as we were chatting, i saw bus 518 passed by and went 'ehh isnt that bus 518'. well it went off and we have to wait for another 30mins

another tchr: [lol] cant you just take the mrt?

indian tchr: im lazy, the bus is a straight bus home

another tchr: since you so lazy you might as well take a cab!

indian tchr: you know why i shop so much? thats cos i don take cabs.
another tchr: [lol] you arh, always shop so much, like some shopping queen like that

indian tchr: so you want to see me naked?!

shes cool i want her to be my teacher.

2007-02-09T22:16:00.000+08:00

hello im back from 1hr25min bus ride haha i think even my head is spinning right now.
anyway was back from ccab went thru the biathlon route and all
okay i think the route is like super complicated and there are like lots of upslopes
so train your upslopes haha hinthinthint and theres a red long steep and dangerous red path
so good luck on that part don fall off and die cos its high and steep and narrow
wait did i mention steep twice

anyway congrats nicole for topping sports sch lol even tho there are only 8 olevel takers
and im still trying to contact bao she aint replying :( oh and haha and my cousin did quite well!
anyway i think my weekend is kinda packed roar. and haha my brother so stupid he hurt his foot and he is crying now. im such a bad sister haha whatever why am i typing in long sentences okay cos i feel like it. and its such a shit feeling when pple dont appreciate your kindness its like you try to help them and they think you are being such a bother or something uhhh ohwell. maybe being nice is no longer great, mean is the new black, man.

2007-02-07T15:19:00.000+08:00

VOTE FOR BEN AND SAM! (:
come on just admit it they are good.
they pop your eyes out.

2007-02-06T19:31:00.000+08:00

okay just sent the list of helpers.
looks like there's gna be quite alot of work for me to do.
i mean in helping out the biathlon next fri, who ask tchr put me in charge! rahh.
this friday have to go for dry run at botanic garden, den thurs some briefing.
zzz and im doomed to complete h3 maths tutorial by thurs.
haha and there was a twist of fate too, hmm.

anyway my mortal finally replied me! after like a week.
i think he's very talented.! haha. anyway, i keep seeing him around.
and i always get very excited when i see him.
haha like as if he's my crush like that.
note: like as if.

on the other hand, i dread seeing my angel around.

2007-02-03T21:57:00.001+08:00

YAY im a genius.

2007-02-03T21:03:00.000+08:00

OMG i hate the new blogger, all the things are gone!
including the haloscan thing. and my font size became ugly-ly HUGE.
its disgusting.
i shall fix it when i have the time to figure out using this NEW SHIT.

the only i like is the new song i put into this blog:
a thousand miles by vanessa carlton.
it shall remain there until im sick of it.

seventeen magazine has absolutely great ideas for valentine's!
but its for the HE, and i have no such HE, so its deemed useless.
OHWELL.

im damn sad, my blog looks ugly.

if i could fall into the sky,
do you think time would pass me by,
cos you know i'd walk a thousand miles
if i could just see you.. tonight.

2007-02-03T20:57:00.000+08:00

why am i in charge of the biathlon marshalling !@#$%^&

2007-02-02T20:47:00.000+08:00

my chem tutor: 'your skirt looks like a tennis skirt'

me: 'oh thats cos im a tennis player.'

jokes. i dont even know how to play tennis.

2007-01-24T18:15:00.000+08:00

haha fortunately im not going for sun's dance comp
[uncle felix wanted us to join de next one instead]
because i got running comp on saturday! zzz.

and some pple amused me, zhuyan was telling me to choose a guy really carefully
and slowly because i have to find someone of high quality
because im someone of high standard, LOL.
and den peter asked me to stop walking past the canoeists during trg
cos i was distracting his juniors. jokes.
i think april fool has came early.

and im gg to be so ggxxed by my ct tmr because i cudnt find my dear physics remedial work. save me!

2007-01-20T15:50:00.000+08:00

went to get bdae gifts at plaza sing for alisa loong and mum after trg
loong's one was the easiest- i already knew what i wanted to get
walked ard for my mum's, which was difficult because i knew her too well
all she wanted is what i cudnt afford to buy. tsk.

and greatness of beauty thrusted upon me as i walked into chomel
oh holy the hairpins and necklaces and all. SO PRETTY
i love the dark purple series. and its relatively cheap, bout 20 bucks for some stuffs
and you know they actually have cheries too! as in cheries braclet, keychain
just like the hair pin i had, i said had because that hair pin was ran over by a car
and got severely crashed. rest in peace my dear hair pin.
anyway got a real pretty necklace for my mum, she better like it
den i was real broke to buy alisa's present so ohwell.

by the way i know wheres de best place to get bdae cards,
simple and nice and just two bucks come on please me and i tell you where to get them

angel and mortal game doesnt seem so bad now because you see i have the brains
haha go figure bout that, and oh i think im one of the first few to receive my angel's letters?
and to top that, after i replied him [a few days later] he gave me a reply on the same afternoon!
i pwned you all

anyway! roy said 'install tagboard'. but im still too lazy
to create a div layer to have space for a tagboard.
so i have here haloscan comments, so you comment on each entry and all
click 'leave a message' and leave a message.
come on better use the function don waste my time installing that OKAY.

2007-01-18T22:28:00.000+08:00

had eye infection, and im doomed to wear the awful specs
which serves no help at all cos i cudnt see the board/lt screen clearly
im half blind now. and very ugly too.
the good thing coming out of it was seeing so many pple concerned bout me
loong was really nice to send me home on monday night
and prayed for me as he covered my eyes with his hands.
and many others who went to ask bout my eyes even tho i dint tell them. thanks all.

felt really depressed so im online now.
the doctor said there was something in my eye
that stopped de tears flowing [i reckon that was what he said]
which may actually cause my eyes to be so sore, dried up and had the infection
but today, i cried. waiting for the damn bus, to come
and i just cried, because i did such a bad training and i felt like a total loser.
sat there looking like an idiot with the tears flowing down my face

i really really want to do well, but others seem to be able to do it so effortlessly
and there i was, pushing so hard and yet i see no result.
my coach was really nice bout it, encouraging me and all
which made me felt all the worse because i would rather he stab me to death on the spot.

sigh.

2007-01-12T22:05:00.000+08:00

im going to work so hard and get a scholarship and get out of this damned place forever.

oh, and angel and mortal game wont work. because i dont feel like writing.
unless of course, he is very cute. but cannot be
cos the cute ones happen to exist in other junior classes.

2007-01-10T15:12:00.000+08:00

why is that the more you try to avoid seeing some things or people,
the more they appear in front of you.

2007-01-07T19:16:00.000+08:00

i was jogging in de morning and i saw pple flying kites!
i want to fly kites too. never fly before. how deprived.
fine shall fly, after the As zzzzzzzz.

and then chacha in de noon and learnt the entire routine, i think.
practised the whole afternoon okay i think im ready for jan28th comp!
hahahha right i accidentally twisted my toe.

2007-01-05T22:51:00.000+08:00

new blog!
but i shall update whenever i feel like. :]
schools starting vroooom vrooom there goes the engine
tada im loving it maybe cos im saddistic liking to slog my way thru the books
but whatever hope im not burning out too soon
and one thing i hate bout school is dat they installed aircons into classrooms
aasdfghjkl makes ur throat dry and ur skin dry
now i have a bad sore throat, bad flu and feeling feverish.
thus the $ spend on strepsils ouchouchouch
hate it we shud have a energy-saving day of each week = no aircon
im all for it man. alright last few days to be ct rep wheee.
and i like this blog layout, i made it! comeon tell me you like it too =]